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2003-09-22 - 9:11 a.m.

Now i really hate feeling like i'm complaining here all the time, but i guess i'm a complainer. i think i always have been, in fact that is what broke up my first "real" relationship. complaining. i complained about everything all the time, i'm a lot better now though, at least i think so. now i just don't say anything most of the time, just keep it inside, or spew it here. that is sort of like keeping it in though, so i don't know if it counts.

what i do know is how crappy last night way for both H and myself. The damn chinchillas were up on and off all night running on that stupid wheel. The problem is that they are a bit too heavy and it hits the bottom of the cage so it sort of sounds like, "Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang!" the whole time they are on it. It seemed everytime we started falling asleep, "Bang" they would start running again. I even tried sleeping on the couch, but the living room is too bright and the couch isn't quite long enough. Damnit.

So, i'm tired and really have no patience for work today. I wish there was some way of getting out of it, but like usual there isn't. i've already taken too many sick days and vacation time off. they are already short handed. and yeah, we could use the money.

the good news is that yesterday we rearranged the house a little bit so it looks bigger and doesn't feel so cramped. there is still work to be done, but overall it looks great. i'm so glad.

we went to a reptile show this weekend, but it sort of sucked. same old shit every booth practically. and some of the people had no clue about what they were talking about. one lady even said to us, "well, it's taken about 2 years for us to understand how to raise the babies, and even now, only about half of them live". And she was trying to sell us a mated pair of chameleons who give live birth! we were like, uh, no. People need to learn how to keep their mouths shut or something.

well, i'm off to call our friend R and tell him he isn't coming over tonight. i just can't deal. he's going through a lot of shit right now, and although i know he needs someone to talk to, i don't think today is a good day for it. i'm too fucking tired and cranky and the whole time i will be thinking "okay, whatever, when are you leaving". so, i'll cancel.

hope you all had a good weekend.

blessed be

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